Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Perez Hilton, Shut the F*ck Up Before Somebody Really Hurts Yo' Ass

Dear Ms. Perez,

Heard about your recent scuffle with Will.I.am and his entourage. You're definitely going to want to put some Icy Hot on that eye.

Let me first start off by saying AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHAHAHHAAH!

I cannot believe your sorry ass is sitting up there in your “statement” video whining and crying about the “violence” that was committed against you. You? Are you kidding me Ms. Perez? As much shit as you talk? I’m surprised your ass wasn’t shot!

The verbal violence you commit day in and day out against people in addition to your contribution to the downfall of humanity being more obsessed with celebrity trash gossip than getting an education beyond a third grade reading level warrants a TKO.

Speaking of education I looked up the word “violence” for you (meaning I dictionary dot com’d it)

an unjust or unwarranted exertion of force or power

Ooops! Miss use of the word Ms. Perez.

Whether it was a member of Will.I.am’s crew or not that punched you dead in your eye the word I believe you might want to replace “violence” with in your statement is KARMA.

Go ahead and call Suge Knight a “faggot” like you did to the Peas and I betchu you will see all types of karmic bullets flying at yo’ ass. They’ll be no sequel to your meltdown festival Ms. Perez.

And why are you using the “f” word in the first place? Aren’t you a gay rights activist Ms. Perez? Weren’t you all over Isaiah Washington during the Grey’s Anatomy scandal scorning that brotha for the use of the derogatory slur? G.L.A.A.D needs to come and knock yo’ ass out Ms. Perez.

Who are you to dictate the rules when you don’t play by them? Sorry, not all people let alone cultures play dat shit.

I think my favorite part of your video was when you talked about how “unprofessional” it was that Will.I.Am’s manager was the one that decked you (if it indeed was) I believe you might have experienced a moment of Urban Chameleonizm.

BOOYAKA! BOOYAKA! Uhhhm, that’s your cue to twitter for the police Ms. Perez.

And just for shits and giggles let’s bring back the Isaiah Washington apology courtesy of Tickles.Tv

Have your Urban Chameleon story featured by e-mailing tickles.tv@gmail.com

click here for: How The Urban Chameleon Came To Be


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