Damn Tiger Woods, How’d You Do It?

by today’s Urban Chameleon contributor

My fabulous Urban Chameleon girlfriends and I call our selves looking to evolve our fabulousity this summer and decided to look into golf- anything to throw white people off with our diverse skill set. Now mind you it’s not like we go looking to throw off white people but if they would stop acting so surprised by our accomplishments then we’ll stop.

Anyhoo hoo to the hoo, the golf obsession started last summer during a trip that my husband and I took with my Jewish best friend and her Jewish husband to the Berkshires. Her husband took us to the driving range to give us a beginner’s lesson. My Jewish girlfriend is not that into golf and much rather go hiking but me being the Urban Chameleon that I am insisted on taking in every note and detail he gave me about perfecting my form just so that I can one day show up on the course in a kente cloth dashiki, Dior shaded and a head wrap and shut’em down. The following day I was ready to get back out there but my Jewish friend insisted on us having a "girls" day sipping Pinot by the pool. As much as I want to expand those skills nothing beats sipping Pinot by the pool so we let the boys have a golf day instead. My husband who is from south west Philly returned at the end of the day after playing 18 holes for the first time to say, “Golf is no bitch ass sport, I’m tired as hell.”

But this year the girls and I are game! (With the exception of the Jewish one who rather watch with Pinot) This past weekend, a Haitian, a Trinidadian, a Jamaican and a Panamanian showed up at Chelsea Piers bright and early ready to start golf lessons except for one tiny problem, THE COST! Not only is golf no bitch ass sport it’s also no cheap ass sport. No wonder there are more brothas playing basketball. Damn Tiger! Much respect and another clear example of how it takes money to make money he clearly is seeing the return on his investment. But we young adult Caribbean Chameleons are currently in the stage of trying to pay off Visa and Mastercard for all that already invested fabulousity before leaping into any additional kind of extreme investment. So trying to prove a point will have to wait. I wonder how much tennis is?

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