Thursday, October 21, 2010

Daddy's, Keep Your Daughters Off the Pole

by today's Urban Chameleon contributor

Chris Rock shared wisdom when he said: “Fathers, our only job is to keep our daughters off the pole “ (or out of the porno video).

So what happened with Montana “Chippy D” Fishburne?

As a 52yr old father of a 19-year old daughter, the same age as Chippy D, my “dad hat” made me over analyze what went wrong here.

What’s been revealed is that Daddy was scarce in Chippy D’s life before she moved in with him, and afterwards, we can guess that it was too much of an adjustment to attend to the new-in-his-daily-world needs and interests of his daughter. This had to be squeezed in somehow (or not) between shooting sequels and Hollywood power lunches. Somewhere during the making of the Matrix, young Chippy discovered getting jiggy, getting on camera, and ultimately getting noticed by everyone else including dad; even if for an Andy Warhol 15 minutes.

Porn makes millionaires, but they are never the 18 year-old wannabees, abusees or refugees on camera. This removes the money motive. So what else led to the barely legal Chippy D, a woman with means being turned out?

I found daddy Fishburne’s interview responses on the subject revealing. Yes, he seemed disappointed and is in fact disowning her until she starts acting right. The last thing Chippy D needs is less attention from daddy. Daddy Fishburne’s real concern seemed to be that Chippy D used the family name, “No one uses their real name in porno,” he stated. That’s only if a person wanted to be anonymous.

Her choice of screen names is a clue about their father-daughter dynamic…and I suspect it went south long before her co-star did. Dad to dad, take notes, Lawrence. I feel your pain, but here’s a tip: Montana’s pain didn’t start when she took off her clothes on camera.

According to Chris Rock who also said that they don’t grade fathers, but if they did …and that dad’s daughter is on a pole (or in a multi-position porno using her family name), Lawrence Fishburne you have failed.

I was divorced from my 19-year-old daughter’s mother many years ago in “War of the Roses” fashion and have been a long-distance dad since she was 5, present no matter the distance. Daughter is today a freshman at Columbia University a poised, well-adjusted, engaging, thoughtful, contributing soul in the world. Her mother and I were a mistake from day one but her birth was a treasured gift and her development a sacred, ancient responsibility that I will always continue to honor.

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