FCF: Is the Black woman too intense for the Black man? The viral video Black Marriage Negotiations reiterated media’s obsession over Black Women’s relationship status. The conversation across the board seems to be around Black women desperately searching for Black love but complaining how there are no good Black men. I know I reconsidered dating outside the race especially after watching Tyler Perry’s film For Colored Girls. Frightened by that kind of Black love, I immediately ran to sign up for the online Jewish matching making site Jdate. I met this man who was clearly not afraid of a good time and although the relationship ended after him not wanting to bring me home to his mama, I realized that dating outside the race also has its issues. However, the key take away here is not only did me and Habad have a damn good time at the West Indian Labor Day Parade but that I took the first step towards love and not race. Should the question that we be asking ourselves, is my search for Black love or any specific love keeping me from love ...or from getting laid. I know one thing’s for sure…it’s complicated. I’m Funnel Cake Flowers your Urban Chameleon news reporter from Tickles.TV
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Funnel Cake Flowers comments on our obsession with "BLACK LOVE"
Monday, March 28, 2011
Why “Black people” and “satire” don’t go together
by today's Urban Chameleon contributor
A couple of weeks ago I had the revelation that Black people don’t do satire. I kind of instinctively knew this for whenever I’ve either read an article or watched a Black web series even remotely satirical, there would be at least one overly serious comment from a Black person not laughing.
The case was no different when I first watched, “The Real Housewives of the Civil Rights?” on TheRoot.com. I thought the video was conceptually hilarious but wasn’t surprised to see in the comments section that more than one viewer was less than amused and in fact out right offended. The consensus was that you don’t touch the women of the Civil Rights especially Coretta Scott King and Rosa Parks.
It got me thinking…why not? Does it some how take away their power? Will it make their extraordinary contribution less significant or worse…reversible? After watching the video I thought if anyone is setting the race back it’s Bravo and their ridiculous Real Housewives franchise (that I love to hate) but not this web video.
The irony of satire is that more often than not the real issue gets overlooked. I realized that “Satire,” is the crazy cousin of “comedy” and for Black folks that crazy cousin is usually…well…embarrassing. Satire exposes flaws and opens the door for criticism by white people. Yes the race that enslaved us, told us we weren’t good enough and would never be good enough. As a result, Black culture has been built on having to constantly prove self worth regardless of how far we’ve come. But is this a habit that it’s time to break away from like poor diets that cause high blood sugar?
Satire is a form of human expression that if one is open to can be very insightful and unconventional medical practitioners would even confirm as healing.
Unfortunately I don’t see enough outlets for laughter in the Black community and this is painful. In fact, I recently attended a film festival and noticed that nine of the ten films produced by Black filmmakers were dramatic and either about Jesus, rape or substance abuse. How can a community possibly evolve unless you address all the layers of our human experiences which definitely includes laughter?
I once read a person’s comment responding to what they took as an author’s inappropriate satirical tone on a “serious” issue suggesting that comedy and drama be kept separate. What they overlooked is that both ideas live in the same core of our existence. The question is how can we begin to learn from both.
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Monday, March 14, 2011
Meet Funnel Cake Flowers, THE URBAN CHAMELEON NEWS REPORTER
Profession: The Urban Chameleon news reporter Age: Old enough to be legal, but young enough to drop it like it is hot.
Race: Blickity, Blickity, Black (don’t let the light skin fool you).
Marital Status: Pending with progress (has recently decided to explore dating men outside of her race and learning Japanese as a result of a new lover).
Hobbies: Getting people to stop taking themselves so seriously... while being very serious.
Episode 1: Funnel Cake Flowers reports on the viral video THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF THE CIVIL RIGHTS. “Can Black people not take a joke or are some jokes just not jokes?”
FCF: Black people seem to struggle with jokes especially when the jokes on Blacks. Last week the all female Black comedy troop, Elite Delta Force 3, released The Real Housewives of the Civil Rights starring some of our most beloved leaders including Rosa Park, Winnie Mandela, Coretta Scott King, Betty Shabazz, Maya Angelou and Marilyn Monroe. The video went viral just after the second day of release upsetting various members of the Black community. Comments suggested that these mother goddesses should not be touched. Fans of the video countered saying that these same critics are at the club dancing to, “Bitch better have my money.” Where’s the line and who gets to decide who crosses it? Can Black people not take a joke? Are some jokes just not jokes? Or is just fear of what white people will do with the jokes. I know one thing’s for sure…it’s complicated. I’m Funnel Cake Flowers your Urban Chameleon news reporter from Tickles.Tv
E-mail Funnel Cake Flowers an Urban Chameleon news story to highlight at tickles@tickles.tv
*Funnel Cake Flowers recently hosted the game show, BREAK THAT STEREOTYPE!, which was an official selection of the Women in Film and Television Film Festival. Watch out now!!!
Monday, February 14, 2011
BREAK THAT STEREOTYPE!
During our URBAN CHAMELEON Media event over the summer we asked people to share how they've been mis-perceived based on their "look" and a variety of interesting stories came up. Add a comedic twist and you get tickled!
If you or someone you know is an Urban Chameleon breaking stereotypes in an usual way let us know! Have your Urban Chameleon story featured by e-mailing tickles@tickles.tv
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www.tickles.tv
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Why do I feel guilty taking off work for MLK DAY?
by today's Urban Chameleon contributor
I'm the only Black guy at my company. I started about two and a half months ago so technically I’m still under a three-month probation before being considered a real employee.
Martin Luther King, Jr. Day is this Monday, as it’s celebrated the third Monday of January every year, a national holiday signed by Ronald Reagan in 1983. I noticed that my company is not closed for the holiday and I’m hot and bothered by this. This is the first time I’ve worked for a company that doesn’t acknowledge Dr. King’s birthday. Apparently, only 33% of business’ close for this day. I wonder if this is racism or taking humanity for granted? Or both? This might sound harsh, but to not acknowledge the birth of a man who died for civil rights is a harder pill for me to swallow.
The owner of the company is Jewish and I thought he’d understand the importance of commemorating a day that represents overcoming hate, murder, oppression and obtaining civil rights – hello Holocaust? I referred to the employee manual to see if I can find supporting evidence for my case. I was ready to approach the company if I saw that the office was closed for Yom Kippur or Rosh Hashanah, but to my surprise the only three holidays we have off are the New Year, Christmas and July 4th. Oh. I had to rethink my approach to this matter.
I decided to see my manager, who also doubles up as HR, and bring the issue to her attention. In my mind, I kept reciting how delicately and politely I would approach the subject to avoid coming off like an angry Black man. A shame that we have to think this way. My manager ended up being really cool and understanding, (not understanding enough to close the office), but explained that because the company is so small with clients who don’t take off for the holiday and are so demanding we can’t afford to close, especially in such a competitive industry. However, if I wanted to take the day off I was more than welcomed, (without it even counting against my vacation days). The irony is that we are a slave to our clients. I thanked her for her time and walked back to my desk but still not satisfied.
A friend of mine told me that he has never worked for a company that's acknowledged MLK Day. He too is the only Black guy, always finding himself in a position of having to contemplate whether or not he should take the day off because feelings of guilt and isolation arise. It's like when you don't play into the culture of corporate America; being a martyr for working to the point of exhaustion. It's a company's responsibility to set a tone and by not acknowledging MLK Day you end up feeling like THAT "Black employee" missing work over THAT "Black holiday."
MLK Day isn't just about “ME and my Black people,” it's for everyone regardless of race. It reminds us of how far we’ve come and how much farther we have to go; Gay people in this country are still fighting for civil rights. Women are still seeking equality. If your office can’t close for the holiday the least they can do is acknowledge the day; even if it’s just a company, “reply all” e-mail, subject: Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day!
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Thursday, January 6, 2011
Is “Tipping” for Service a Cultural Thing?
A friend of mine always says that he doesn’t understand why poverty exists. “If all the billionaires in the world got together and gave back we wouldn’t have poverty.”But there may be a more fundamental problem to attack first...tipping. Some see this as an unjustified donation. In fact, another friend (a Black woman), told me she can’t stand to see a tip jar by the cash register, especially at a coffee house. “Why am I tipping you on $1.25 coffee, that’s like putting your hand out and begging.”
Meanwhile, a different friend (a Black man) over tips for everything, as if he’s personally trying to correct the actions, or rather lack of actions, of people like her who’ve given the race a bad name. If you’ve worked in the service industry in America, like I have, where tips are not included in the paycheck and the establishment you’re working for has factored this in, therefore paying you minimum wage, there may be justification for much ‘tude to someone who doesn’t tip you.
The stigma of Black folks not tipping has caused a cultural split, which ironically is reflected by my two friends; One side under tips or doesn't tip at all and the other over tips to overcompensate for the ones that don’t.
The friend who came up with the solution to end poverty, (who also happens to be Black), shared an article with me where Warren Buffet and Bill Gates were attempting to do exactly what he had suggested, gather all the billionaires around the world to tackle global poverty. However, one of the biggest challenges is first getting billionaires from around the world to understand the significance of “giving back,” a concept that does not even exist in some of their cultures.
It made me think about whether or not there might be a mental or emotional block in Black culture around tipping. Ya know there were all those years where we did work for free. Like anything else, some folks may just be moving at a slower pace to wrap their heads and hearts around this thing called tipping.
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Sunday, December 12, 2010
"Without a BMW, I’m Just a Negro With an Opinion"
That’s right I said it, “Without a BMW, I’m just a Negro with an opinion.” That’s what my NAACP, MBA, PHD, Fulbright scholar, friend told me the other day. I almost spit out my peppermint tea. I wasn’t sure if he was being comical or not; even though his sentiment nearly made me inhale my drink through my nose, the sincerity in which he said it really got me thinking… How ironic is it that a scholar has the same aspirations as a drug dealer/rapper.
My scholarly friend had just purchased himself a new 7series Black BMW. He called to see if I was home before driving to my crib to show off his new ride. Daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn, that joint is fly! Massage seats, mirrors that fold in and rotate up at a ninety-degree angle, and an automated notepad that can record messages, thoughts, and pontifications while you are driving. Automatic windshield wipers that can sense weather conditions, regardless of rain, hail, sleet or snow. Here my friend was, someone who had spent years dedicating himself to higher learning, who in this moment was feeling himself like the drug dealer, Caine, from Menace to Society driving around in his new ride. I loved it. Where was the context in media for this kind of Black man?
I laughed when he told me about how his BMW had changed his life. Valet's, at restaurants now call him “sir”, women are checking out to see who he is, and business men confront him just to give respect. A meter maid asked what he had to do to get "a ride like that" before allowing him to park in a red zone. My friend coolly responded, “I’m a professor.”
Before the BMW,his family for years wondered why someone with all of his degrees, who they occasionally saw on TV, (not realizing that just because you’re on TV doesn’t mean you’re rich), was driving a hoopty. He was cleaning up his credit and responsibly putting his money aside for his house before indulging in materialistic desires. However, they couldn’t see that. Especially not his sixteen year old nephew who he had been trying to help stay out of trouble. He told me about the time his nephew was sent to stay with him and how he tried to talk to him about the rewards of owning a house, but the kid took one look at his hoopty and couldn’t hear a word. A house has abstract value, especially after the great crash, and especially to a sixteen year old. It wasn’t until his nephew saw his BMW did he emulate the cinematic emotion of that popular movie line, “Now you got the juice.”
What it boils down to is the American dream is the same inside the 'hood as it is out, and he had lived in both environments long enough to confirm this. His lectures suddenly hold more weight with both students and colleagues continuing to give him "the juice." Like he said, Before the BMW he was just a Negro with an opinion.
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